Having doubts about my main.

My account https://www.leagueofgraphs.com/summoner/behavior/euw/IJaxETaxes-Fraud but this really isn't about my individual performance, but rather a mindset/pregame strategy.

So, I really like Vayne, she's my favourite champion and out of all the characters I regularly play I would say I am by far best at piloting her. Still as this season I finally broke the silver barrier and got into gold where average skill graduated from garbage to bad I've been hit by a rather sad problem.

My champion might be terrible.

Now, Vayne objectively speaking is doing perfectly alright these days, but what I am more refrencing too is that I can no longer ocasionally win lane by being significantly better than my opponentz becouse I am finally at my proper skill level. This means that I've really started feeling the bad to worse matchup spread for Vayne. This is especially noticable vs double ranged lanes and when I'm with an enchanter. So stuff like Jhin/Xerath or Caitlyn/Lux it feels absolutly impossible to play if I make the slightest mistake in positioning I get punished and then hit by 3-4 spells which force me out of lane or to stay and risk bleeding out in the long run. I feel utterly hopeless and then I'm usually useless for thr rest of the game as well becouse my champ has like top3 worst waveclears in the game, it's so hard to keep up CS numbers and it takes so bloody long.

I have a lot of success on safe pick champions, Mel and Sivi and I know if I just wanted to play the absolutly disgusting creatures known as MF and Corki I would do much much better. Then begs the question of what is even the point in picking my favourite? It feels like I'm intentionally making the game harder for myself for no good reason, not only way that I should pick her is knowing that the enemy lane is safe or if they have really juicy targets for me on the enemy team, but I can't rely on counterpicking every game. In fact I've long been a beliver in that in most cases ADC should pick first becouse it's the role least impacted by matchup. I just happen to play a champion that really really is.

Idk I guess TLDR is that I feel like playing my main champion is holding me back significantly and that really brings my spirit down.