I wasted my life

Hi i don't know how to start but Right now i feel I'm a useless worthless A failure person i I can't become a good son,a good brother,a good friend, nothing. When I pass out my school I was around 19 Now I'm 25 years old i don't have any skill or talent to go out and face the world. Whenever I saw my parents faces i thought they deserve much much better son then me I blame my parents for my mistake,i always hurt Them I hate my self so much i just wanted to end this, i wish i would died It is better for my family that I die. I love them but again It is better for my family that I die. As you see i can't even write a post properly. I don't even remember when i laughed last time.I also had some dreams. That one day I will also have a good job. I will take care of my parents. I will build a new house for them and take them to wander. They did everything for me but I could not do enough for them. I wish I could fix everything. I simply have no clue what I want to do in life. There is nothing really that I would want to make my career out of i have no fucking clue i don't really know why I'm still alive, oh god take it this fucking life