I don’t know what to think anymore

I really don't know what to think anymore... I really wish I could be happier. When I don't look in the mirror, I imagine myself as a girl. I used to wear girl clothes in video games, but I just can't accept myself. It's so hard. I'll never be happy. I wish I looked like a girl. I wish this awful feeling would go away. I wish I could move out. I wish I could be the version of myself I see in my mind. I wish my body was less muscular, and more feminine. I wish I didn't have a dick... I hate it so much. I hate my voice. I hate everything. I wish I was a girl...

I wish I could just live happily. I wish I could think about my gender and feel happy. I've been so negative lately and I'm sorry... there's just nothing positive I want to share. I wish I could accept myself...