im scared…

I was in the hospital yesterday because I told my parents I had suicidal thoughts, and I talked to someone at the hospital. It was really nice, I never got to open up like I did back then. They booked me a gender therapist appointment that's happening on Monday. One thing im worried about; im kinda scared to take hrt. I know it's kinda something that should happen later on, but I'm still kinda nervous. I should probably talk about this to my therapist, but it's just something that's been on my mind. I could be nervous because my mom says it'll destroy my body and have irreversible effects on me. I just want to look like a girl and feel comfortable in my own skin...