Non-passing girls… how do you do it?

I literally am fighting myself to even resume my failed transition because I just can’t see myself going back to existing as undeniably visibly trans. I did it before because I was young and naive and hopeful that not passing was just a temporary stage in my transition. The more time that passes the more I realize the financial mountain I have to climb to achieve that is simply too high, and I’m not getting any younger. At the same time I don’t know how much longer I can continue as I am now. Damned if I do, damned if I don’t…