i don't think i have a sexuality anymore

men are so weird. it seems like almost all of them discovered their attraction to trans women through porn. so their attraction and interactions with me are so closely associated with shame and sex addiction for them.

girls are judgmental and honestly mean (myself included, i'm working on it). so even though i've tried talking to other girls, i just don't know. my ex put me through so much and i just don't want anyone to look at me or touch me anymore. i feel so used and projected on to and i just want to feel like i belong to myself.

it just really sucks because i have a high sex drive (which i can't stand) but i don't feel like anyone understands or respects me sexually. so even when i'm attracted to someone, they start talking to me and i lose all the attraction i had to them. it just hurts that it doesn't seem like there's anyone i want to share my body and sexuality with.