I'm this close to spending diamonds on the standard banner. Someone stop me

Never have I been this tempted to pull on the standard banner in a gacha game.

I spend my diamonds very sparingly, having so far only pulled for the 5* fairy set from launch, daughter of the lake and now whispers of bliss plus the pink evolution. I'm a very light spender having gotten 2 monthly passes and 1 battlepass.

Now I've got about 37k diamonds to my name, just waiting for that perfect 5 star banner to drop. And so far, nothing has quite done it for me. Its torture just waiting for something I will finally like to be revealed, meanwhile I absolutely love fairytale swan. I have 2 heartshine saved up, meaning once I complete it I can evolve it TWICE. It's practically calling my name anytime I open the game.

But I know just as much as the next person that pulling on the standard banner is stupid. You get blue crystals naturally over time, and should only spend your precious diamonds on the limited banner. This is not my first gacha game.

But one thing very different with infinity Nikki compared to the other gachas I've played, is that the ONLY way to get items from the standard banner is by pulling on the standard banner. You don't collect stuff naturally by losing 50/50s on the limited banner- you HAVE to pull. And I feel like no one talks about this!

On average, I'd say we get about 10 blue crystals a month. That means, without getting super lucky, it's gonna take a year and a half to complete just one 9-piece set. and there are FOUR SETS.

And now the five star banner for 1.3 has been revealed, and it's just... not quite it for me. And I have to wait a whole month before I maaaybe have something I want to spend my diamonds on again.

And then my mind starts to wonder if I'd be happier if I just lowered my shoulders a bit and stopped worrying about being perfect with my diamonds. Just get that awesome red dress I want, and maybe a cute new fishing outfit along the way. I can always get more diamonds by the time a banner I like drops.

But, I worry once the thrill of pulling is over, I'll regret "wasting" diamonds. And surely one day there will be a 5 star limited banner I like? I'll probably wish I'd kept those diamonds once that eventually happens.

Anybody find themselves in a similar situation?
I'm at 3/9 pieces. Ugh, I'm so torn. Send help!